Updated: Jun 11, 2019
Womanhood and women empowerment tend to be framed as a relentless fight against a system that is rigged against us. Perhaps it is a unifying tactic or a way to get us to react to the unjust things that form part of our lived experiences. I really don't know. But what I have noticed is that in thinking about womanhood and women empowerment, accountability for our actions is suspiciously left out.
I say 'suspicious' because it seems obvious to me that in the attempt to build ourselves from the constant raids on our confidence, bodies and personalities, we should be talking about how to be accountable for our part in our misfortunes. It is a vital step in fortifying ourselves and protecting the sanctity of womanhood and women empowerment.
They say that there are three stages of personal accountability: inform, explain and justify. When you do something that you were not supposed to do, you inform yourself; admit to what you have done.
You then explain why you did it, providing context to your behaviour which then forms part of the justification for it. The fourth, hidden stage is punishment: accepting the consequences of your actions. This stage in particular is an intense, long look in the mirror. We all know how complicated the relationship between woman and her mirror is.
I do feel though that now is as good a time as any to carve out a few minutes of your day or week, strip down and take an intense, long look in the mirror (taking care not to be self-deprecating).
Avoiding consequences by blaming the system for things you know good and well are entirely your own doing is lazy. The way society is currently set up, laziness is not something we should not allow.
By Nande Nodada